How to Deal With Your Loss After a Molar Pregnancy

A molar pregnancy (hydatidiform mole) diagnosis can be devastating. One day you are expecting a baby, and the next you are told that there is an abnormal growth in your uterus. Whether it is partial (a fetus has formed) or complete (there is no fetus), a molar pregnancy is never viable.

Between the dilation and curettage (D&C), blood tests, and clinic visits, it can feel like this will never end. On top of that, you are told that you need to avoid getting pregnant again for 12 months. How are you supposed to deal with your loss after a molar pregnancy?

Allow yourself to grieve in your own way

Everyone grieves a loss in their own way, and at their own pace. One person finds herself numb, while another goes from crying to disbelief. It might take you a few days, or even a few weeks, to sink in. However you grieve your loss, as long as you are not hurting yourself or someone else, it is not wrong.

Take some time to yourself and do the things you enjoy

Once you have allowed yourself to grieve, you will need to start moving on. Take time to yourself, even if it means taking a day or a week off from work. Do whatever it is that makes you feel better. Some like to pamper themselves with bubble baths, massages, and manicures, while others simply curl up with a pillow and a good book. Get out and hike, garden, or do whatever you enjoy.

Talk to someone you trust -- but only when you are ready

Only you can decide when you are ready to talk about what you have been through. Talking it out is good, but you don't have to share with everyone who asks. This is a very personal, and even painful, time in your life. Share your feelings with a friend or close family member when you are ready.

Be there for your partner and allow him to express his feelings

In many cases, there is another person who is going through the loss of a baby. Your partner was also expecting a baby that will never arrive, and he might be going through a range of emotions, too. Make a point to ask your partner how he is feeling, and even if he doesn't have much to say right now, listen and be there for him when he is ready.

Find ways to keep yourself busy over the next year

Think of ways to keep busy over the next year, whether it's planning a trip or working on a long-term project. Then do them. Before you know it, the year will have gone by and hopefully you can start planning for another baby, if that is your wish.

Speak with your doctor about visiting a grief counselor

If you experience long periods of depression or suicidal thoughts, call your doctor. Ask about visiting a grief counselor so you can move on with your life.

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Why Are You Supposed to Sleep on Your Left Side During Pregnancy?

Pregnancy is a time full of lifestyle changes and new adjustments. From the expected (no more smoking!) to the bizarre (no more hot dogs?), it can be hard to filter out the good advice from the bad. One tip you may have heard from friends, family, or your healthcare provider is that you should only sleep on your left side, but just how important is it to follow that advice, and what are the risks if you don't? Ultimately, it is good advice to sleep on your left side if you're able, but if you can't, don't sweat it.

Why sleeping on your back is a bad idea
Although sleeping on your back during early pregnancy isn't likely to cause problems, back-sleeping can be a huge pain in the butt (literally) during the late stages. The American Pregnancy Association warns that moms who sleep on their backs have a higher rate of discomforts like hemorrhoids, back pain, and stomach aches. As your belly grows, sleeping on your back also puts pressure on your aorta and vena cava, two important blood vessels that move blood to and from the placenta. As a result, sleeping on your back could reduce the amount of oxygen and nutrients that your baby receives.
 

Why your left side, not your right?
 

The vena cavae blood vessels (big veins that return blood to your heart from your abdomen) are located just to the right side of your body, so sleeping on your right side might be a bad idea. There's some evidence that, like sleeping on your back, right-side sleeping could put a lot of the baby's weight against your blood vessels. This might reduce the amount of blood pumping to and from your heart, which could have bad consequences for the baby.

What happens if you sleep in the "wrong" position?
 

Hopefully, nothing. We don't yet know exactly what might happen if you don't sleep on your left side during pregnancy, since it hasn't been studied very well. In theory, it seems like babies whose moms sleep in other positions might have a lower birth weight. One very unsettling study found that women who slept on their backs during pregnancy had well over twice the risk of giving birth to stillborn babies. Even though this study had some limitations and the findings weren't conclusive, it's still safest to try to sleep on your left side if you're able.

If you can't sleep on your left side...
 

Don't worry too much. Evidence of danger to your baby from other positions is very limited. For example, the most publicized study on the issue only looked at the outcomes of a fairly small number of women, and they relied on women's self-reporting, which isn't always reliable, especially after something as traumatic as a stillbirth. So, for now, there's not enough evidence to sweat it if you absolutely can't get comfortable on your left side. However, you may want to try adjusting your sleep position by experimenting with body pillows or raising the head of your bed to see if it helps. You might be able to get a restful night's sleep in the safest position possible, but, if the discomforts of pregnancy make it too difficult, there isn't a reason to worry.

Of course, as always, talk to your doctor or midwife about any concerns about your health that you may have during any stage of pregnancy. Your health care provider can offer reassurance or help provide personalized advice that can make it easier to sleep safely and comfortably while you await your baby's arrival.

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What to Expect Before Having a Hysterectomy

Last month I had a hysterectomy. Some of what happened before the procedure was expected, but others were a complete surprise to me. If you are planning on having a hysterectomy, make sure you talk to your doctor and fully understand all that will take place before your procedure. Please note that your doctor's preparations may vary from mine, but you will likely be able to expect most of the following to occur before your hysterectomy.

Ultrasound examination

One of the first things that my doctor scheduled after my yearly exam indicated that I might need a hysterectomy is an ultrasound examination of my ovaries and uterus. This is not like the ultrasound you might have had while you were pregnant. This is what's called a transvaginal ultrasound, and is performed by inserting a wand in the vagina to get clear images of the uterus, ovaries and surrounding tissue.

Your ultrasound should be scheduled a few days after your period, so that the walls of the uterus are easier to examine. The exam itself is relatively painless, although you may feel some pressure as the technician moves the wand to get the best views needed by your doctor. On a positive note, you don't need a full bladder for this type of ultrasound.

Pre-op appointment at the hospital

I recently wrote an article about what to expect at your pre-op appointment. Besides lots of paperwork, you'll need to have an EKG, give a urine sample and have some blood drawn. You may also need a chest x-ray and possibly other exams depending on your health. Make sure to take your insurance card, identification and a list of medications you are taking to the hospital for this appointment. And as I mentioned in my previous article, plan on being there a while, as pre-op appointments can take hours.

Bowel prep

Oh, the worst surprise I had before my hysterectomy was the fact that I would have to perform a bowel prep before the surgery. I had no idea that would be necessary. I expected to do one sometime this year for my first colonoscopy, but thanks to the hysterectomy, I got some extra practice.

If you have never done a bowel prep, this is what you might expect. First, you will need to fast, consuming only liquids the day before your procedure. I was allowed a light breakfast, but after that, nothing but broth, Jell-O (not red) and clear liquids were allowed. You'll need to drink lots of liquids, especially water, to stay hydrated up until about midnight, after which no food or drinks are allowed.

In the afternoon or early evening, you will likely take a laxative, either in the form of a salty liquid or pills, depending on your doctor's instructions. This will serve to empty your colon and prep your bowel for surgery. Even though your hysterectomy will likely not involve your colon, your doctor will be working very close to your intestines and the bowel prep will help prevent infection in case of any complications.

Medicated douche

After your bowel prep is complete, and trust me, you'll know when it's over, your doctor may want you to use a medicated douche to help further prevent any chances of infection. These are available over the counter. One word of warning, though: medicated douches may contain iodine. If you are allergic or sensitive to iodine, talk to your doctor about alternatives.

At the hospital

Once you arrive at the hospital, you'll face a flurry of activity as nurses and doctors get you ready for your procedure. Try to relax. Although everything may seem hectic, before you know it you'll be sleeping and recovering from the surgery in your hospital room. And not long after that, you'll get to eat again, and if you're lucky, maybe you can get extra bacon with your breakfast the next morning. Go ahead and ask for it. You deserve it!

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Unassisted Pregnancy: Designing a Prenatal Self-Care Routine

How to Take Good Care of Yourself when Preparing for an Unassisted Birth

There are a few things that a pregnant woman can't do for herself, but usually they aren't necessary. Most of the tests professionals perform can be done at home, affordably, and certainly women are capable of measuring their vitals. Most of a prenatal visit is spent answering and asking questions about the pregnancy, but most answers can easily be found by picking up a book or doing an internet search. More and more women are choosing not to see pregnancy as a medical condition needing treatment, and they are foregoing formal prenatal care unless high risk. Some women have none at all, and many more monitor and test themselves. It's not hard to develope a prenatal self-care routine.

In an earlier piece I discussed routine prenatal testing that may be harmful or unnecessary. First you must decide which tests, if any, you will have. STD testing includes Hepatitis B & C, Syphilis, and HIV, all blood tests. The Pap Smear checks for chlamydia, gonorrhea, and cervical cancer (which is usually caused by HPV.) It can also locate cervical abnormalities such as an incompetent cervix, as well as vaginal infections. Your blood work usually includes a blood type check, a Cystic Fibrosis and Tay-Sachs screening test, the Triple/Quad Screen, Anemia check, and a check for German measles and chickenpox. CVS and Amniocentesis may be done to check for deformities and defects. GBS tests for group B streptococcus, which can (rarely) cause infection in the newborn.

Most of these tests are unnecessary. If you may have been exposed to an STD, if you may have a child with a defect or would discontinue the pregnancy if so, if you don't know your blood type or are at risk for measles and chickenpox, you may wish to have those tests performed. I recommend testing for these conditions if you can, because the more complete your home records are, the better you'll be treated when interviewing pediatricians or if you end up in the ER. Many can be performed at home, and some must be done by a doctor. The ones only available from a doctor, such as CVS and Amniocentesis, are actually the least necessary. Many women do chose to at least go in for one ultrasound, but they do as much home self-prenatal care as possible.

Tests for vaginosis, anemia, HIV, Hepatitis C, chlamydia, GBS, and gestational diabetes can be done at home. The others must be done by a health professional, and if it's unlikely that you would have abnormal results, there is no harm in refusing them. Craigmedical.com sells a lot of home tests at very affordable prices, and froogle is another good place to search. The Gestational Diabetes test is performed around 24 weeks. Fast for 8-10 hours, drink the special beverage, and then test your blood sugar an hour later; the supplies can be bought online. You can also buy urinalysis strips to use every few weeks. A combination chlamydia and GBS screen are available at drthom.com and should be taken near the end of the pregnancy. Whether you make that part of your self-prenatal care routine is up to you.

You need to create a schedule for monitoring your pregnancy. You may wish to check every week, every other week, or once a month. I recommend picking the same day and time for every check. At the most, you should do your routine once a week, and at the least it should be done very month--which is how often traditional prenatal routines are performed. Many useful materials are available at allheart.com at affordable prices, such as blood pressure cuffs and fetoscopes. You should start prenatal care no earlier than 8 weeks and no later than 12 weeks, which is when appointments traditionally begin. Design your self-prenatal care routine the way you want.

Routinely monitoring yourself can give you a picture of how your pregnancy is going. It will make it easy to spot warning signs of complications. Keeping a record will be useful when dealing with doctors. If they have no clue what your pregnancy has been like, they'll be cautious and treat you as an emergency for having had no prenatal care. A diary assures them you have done your homework and are taking care of yourself. It can help them make a diagnosis and recommendations about treatment. It can also assure you and those close to you that everything is fine. A self-prenatal care routine has a lot of benefits.

You should routinely monitor your weight, blood pressure (many pharmacies have blood pressure machines!), pulse, and symptoms. Write down how you are treating your symptoms. Begin recording the fetal heartbeat when you can hear it (10 weeks Doppler, 20 weeks fetoscope). When you can feel your uterus (16 weeks), measure your fundal height, distance from navel and pelvis in centimeters. This can help establish a due date and let you know you're growing as you should. You should record the first day of your last menstrual period, your pre-pregnancy weight, the date that you got your positive pregnancy test, and your estimated due date. In the third trimester, learn to palpitate your stomach to determine the position of the baby and placenta. Write down what you discover. I don't recommend cervical checks.

How much prenatal care you perform or receive is up to you. It doesn't have to be all or nothing. You can do as much or as little as you want. You decide what tests are necessary and how often you need to monitor yourself. You are likely to pay far more attention to what is going on than a doctor, as this is your body, your pregnancy, and your baby. You have much more vested in your well-being. The standard of care you can give yourself, unless you are high risk, is quite high, despite the popular belief that prenatal self-care is useless. A woman recording her weight is just as good as a doctor doing it! Take good care of yourself by exercising and following a healthy diet, as well as performing prenatal care. Good luck to you in this incredibly journey to motherhood! I'm sure you will create the self-prenatal care routine that is right for you.

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Truth About Parenting

Pregnancy can be a wonderful thing for some, and for some, it can be slightly tiring and hard. It's a time where you finally realize just what a woman's body can really do. No textbooks can ever describe what it's really like. Especially if it's hard for someone to get pregnant. But parenthood is a whole different ballgame from pregnancy. It's an open door that leads to a lot of possibilities and exciting "first-time" moments. But it's also very hard to do, Especially if you are a single parent.

• Sleep: You'll hear the, "sleep when baby sleeps" or how you will probably never sleep again. You never understand this until you do actually have a child. For some, sleeping when the baby sleeps is hard, no matter how exhausted you may be. Babies require a lot of attention and it can be hard to get some time to yourself. So when the baby actually does go to sleep, you might start to think of a million things you need to get done before the baby awakes. Such as, do the dishes, wash clothes, take a shower, EAT! And maybe even work, if you are a stay-at-home parent, like myself. If you are the lucky ones, your baby will be content in the crib or in a comfy chair and will allow you to get some stuff done. Whatever one you get, just remember to breathe. It's frustrating now to only run on 2 hours of sleep, but it will pass.

• Annoyance: Let's get one thing straight, if you are a new parent, this is completely normal! Sometimes, parents will get so frustrating, that they'll feel annoyed by this little human being that's screaming and demanding to be held 24/7. It's normal and it's okay to feel this way. To wonder why you wanted to be a parent or why you even got pregnant in the first place. Parenthood is overwhelming and it takes time to get used to and familiar with. Now if you feel sad or depressed, it's probably best to talk to someone or your doctor about this. This could be "post-partum depression." Normal after you give birth, but sometimes it can drag on for too long and that's when you might need professional help.

• Unsolicited Advice: Being a first time mother, you are bond to run into those few people who will sit there and try to give you unwanted advice on how to raise your own child and what you need to do. Now some advice is much welcomed and very much needed, but then there are those advices where you feel like someone is concededly trying to hint at you that you aren't doing a very good job. There isn't much you can do about this, expect tell that person that while you do appreciate their advice, you would like it very much if they would stop being so pushy on you. Not wanting to hurt those you care for, feelings, can be frustrating and a little maddening. However you handle this, just remember, they don't do it out of annoyance, but out of love.

• Hormones: From personal experience, once your little one starts hitting the 5 month mark, you are going to go through so many emotions.Ranging from excitement, to sadness. But this is normal to look forward to your precious one growing, being excited for all the wonderful(and sometimes, irritating) milestones, while also feeling a sense of sadness that your little one is, indeed, growing up. And no matter how hard we may try as parents, our dear ones will continue to grow, even against our will, before our eyes. I cried a good bit of the first 7 months because whenever someone would mention how big my son was getting or how fast he was growing, it sent a wave of sadness throughout my body, because he wouldn't be my little infant, for much longer, -but now my toddler. Once he hit the one year mark, I expected to cry again, but I guess I had gotten it all out of my system beforehand, that I really didn't have many tears to spare at the time. And this is good, because I was able to enjoy my son's first birthday with true excitement in my heart for what the future held for us.

I'm not going to lie, parenthood is hard, it's frustrating, and it can be very maddening. But at the end of the night when you put your child down for bed, you are always reminded just why you wanted to do this in the first place and why you continue to do it every single day. I became a teen mom and was not physically prepared for what was to come. And after 4 months of crying because I couldn't get the baby to calm down and needing my mother's help at times, I surely didn't think there was ever going to be an end to all this maddening! But soon came the end to a lot of things and as I grew with my son, I became used to a lot of the stuff I wasn't. I can run on 4 hours of sleep and still have energy to keep going at the end of the night. Point being; it hard times will end. And when it does, you'll look back and wonder why you got so worked up over the little things.

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Top Five Reasons Infertility is Hard

Infertility and Trying to Conceive

Are you TTC?

Infertility, it is the one thing that plagues millions of Americans. And yet, trying to conceive (TTC) pushes moms to try just about anything. No matter if it is an old wives' tale, or just some new invention to help fertility, women trying to become pregnant will try just about anything to help in the process.

If I sound like I know something or two about this subject, it would be because I do. Yes, I am not hiding my face, I can admit my own struggles, not for myself, but for all the women that have to dealt with this painful subject of trying to conceive and the infertility that comes with this process.

But in light of this serious subject, here are my own top reasons infertility is hard. And yes, each women or couple who have gone through this can come up with their own, as there are many reasons it is difficult.

Top Five Reasons Infertility is Hard

#5

One of the hardest things that come with infertility is the frustration that usually follows a woman month to month. No, it isn't just a once a month thing. It becomes a lifestyle of trying to conceive.

#4

You have to watch women around you get pregnant, have babies, and you still are left with nothing. Yes, you're happy for them, but there is that little place inside you that aches for a baby.

#3

Did you ever hear someone say, "Just be patient. It will happen it when you least expect it." Only a woman who is TTC can understand the frustration that comes with this statement.

#2

Whether you know why you can't conceive or merely are struggling with the infertility on your own, there are no words to say; it is just difficult. Especially, when you've tried everything you know to try and still nothing. Sometimes, patience can be a pill to digest.

#1

No matter what you try yourself, it all is in the hands of Providence. All you can do is make your body the healthiest you can. Do all the things we've heard so much about: exercise, drink water, take herbs, and watch for ovulation...And Wait! In the end, it is in God's hands of when you will conceive.

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Is Your Teen Being Pressured to Have a Baby?

A compelling report form the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists released in January puts a spotlight on "reproductive coercion." According to the ACOG, reproductive coercion, or the act of forcing or compelling a partner to get pregnant, is a serious problem for many women. Partners sometimes even sabotage birth control in order to achieve their goal.

Of course, this is nothing new, and reproductive coercion is certainly not an act unique to men. Both men and women have used shady means to get their partners to participate in baby making perhaps as long as people have been reproducing. Trickery, emotional blackmail, threats of violence or other acts of coercion are troubling, especially when used as a means to bring an innocent baby into the world.

Teens at risk

Teens may be especially at risk of reproductive coercion. Not only are they young and inexperienced, but they may lack the support and resources needed to protect themselves from an unwanted pregnancy. Or they may be emotionally vulnerable enough to be easily manipulated into believing they want to have a baby, too, if that is what their partner desires.

Think your teen is not at risk? According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, approximately 46 percent of all teens have had sex. About 1 out of every 25 teen girls gives birth, for a total of approximately 400,000 births each year. That doesn't even include the number of abortions performed on teens, more than 200,000 additional unborn babies destroyed in the wombs of teenage mothers each year according to the Guttmacher Institute.

Communication is critical

It is vitally important that parents communicate with their teens. Teens who are comfortable talking with their parents may be more likely to abstain from sex or ask for help obtaining birth control before they become sexually active. They may also be more willing to talk about how they are feeling if their boyfriend or girlfriend begins to pressure them to have unprotected sex.

Remember that teens are less able to reason than adults. They may be much more vulnerable to reproductive coercion from their partner than you might think. The threat of a break up or the promise of a happy life together can be compelling to a teen in love, and it's harder for them to process the consequences of becoming a teen parent.

Steps you can take

Role play some of the arguments a partner might make in order to coerce your teen into having unprotected sex. Discuss the tricks a partner might use to sabotage birth control or otherwise entrap a partner. Use statistics and specific cases to demonstrate how promises of forever made as teens don't often work out. Have all these talks before you see signs of trouble, and repeat them as your teen becomes more involved with a significant other.

Most of all, work to maintain a relationship of love and trust with your teen, so that they know they can come to you with any problem big or small. Your support could make all the difference in your teen's ability to say no.

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Strong Link Between Caesarean Babies and BMI

Babies Born by C-section Have a 26% Higher Risk for Being Overweight or Obese in Adulthood

It has been suggested that the type of delivery is a potentially powerful influence upon long-term health, may affect later life body mass index (BMI).

Researchers from the Imperial College London conducted a systematic review and meta-analysis of the effect of Caesarean section (CS) and vaginal delivery (VD) on offspring BMI, overweight (BMI>25) and obesity (BMI>30) in adulthood. This new study included data from 10 countries that was obtained from a search for any article published before 31st March 2012, in Pubmed, Google Scholar and Web of Science.

The researchers identified 35 studies and 15 studies with a combined population of 163,753 were suitable for inclusion in the meta-analysis.

The researchers found that the average BMI of adults born by caesarean section is around half a unit more than those born by vaginal delivery and an increased odds of overweight and obesity >20%; these findings are consistent across sexes.

In their conclusion the researchers write "There is a strong association between CS and increased offspring BMI, overweight and obesity in adulthood. Given the rising CS rate worldwide there is a need to determine whether this is causal, or reflective of confounding influences."

The researchers note that findings from their meta-analysis are consistent with findings from other investigators. Shortly after completing their review a meta-analysis published in the International Journal of Obesity (July 2013) presented adult data from 3 studies that specifically examined the effect of mode of delivery and offspring overweight/obesity. The results reported 50% higher odds of obesity in adults born by CS compared to their VD counterparts from a systematic review and meta-analysis.

The authors note that they cannot be certain that caesarean delivery causes higher body weight, as the association may be explained by other factors that were not recorded in the data they analyzed.

Professor Neena Modi, Professor of Neonatal Medicine at Imperial College London and senior author of study commented "There are good reasons why C-section may be the best option for many mothers and their babies, and C-sections can on occasion be life-saving. However, we need to understand the long-term outcomes in order to provide the best advice to women who are considering caesarean delivery."

"This study shows that babies born by C-section are more likely to be overweight or obese later in life. We now need to determine whether this is the result of the C-section, or if other reasons explain the association."

Dr. Matthew Hyde, Research Associate in the Section of Neonatal Medicine, Faculty of Medicine, Imperial College London and corresponding author of this commented "There are plausible mechanisms by which caesarean delivery might influence later body weight. The types of healthy bacteria in the gut differ in babies born by caesarean and vaginal delivery, which can have broad effects on health. Also, the compression of the baby during vaginal birth appears to influence which genes are switched on, and this could have a long-term effect on metabolism."

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Relieving Constipation and Bloating During Pregnancy

If you are pregnant and having bowel issues such as constipation, diarrhea, bloating or even irritable bowel syndrome, you are far from alone. In fact, according to a recent study from Loyola University, up to 72 percent of women suffer from these symptoms while pregnant.

What surprised me the most about the study was the fact that most of the women who suffered from bowel issues didn't seem to think it decreased their quality of life much. The women rated the impact they believed their symptoms had on their quality of life, and the impact only amounted to about a 5 percent decline in overall satisfaction.

The two symptoms that had the most impact on the women surveyed were constipation and bloating. That makes sense to me. Both of those conditions are uncomfortable or even painful when you are not pregnant, but add a baby to the mix and that's really no fun. But there are some ways pregnant women can help relieve the constipation and bloating and feel better.

Consume more fiber

According to the Loyola study pregnant women may need to double up on their fiber intake. They recommend consuming 25 to 30 grams of fiber each day, but note that the women in their study averaged only about 16 to 17 grams. Fruits, vegetables and cereals that are high in fiber are a great way to boost not only your fiber intake, but essential vitamins and nutrients as well. Ask your doctor before adding fiber supplements, just to make sure they are safe for you.

Drink more water

Between the increased blood volume your body has to support during pregnancy and your baby's amniotic fluid, your need for water is greatly increased. I had a hard time drinking enough water when I was carrying twins, perhaps because they took up so much room. But I knew it was important, especially if I wanted to carry them close to term.

Drinking more water will not only help your baby, it will help keep you from becoming dehydrated, which can lead quickly to painful constipation. More water will help keep your bowels moving and make you feel better throughout your pregnancy. Start your day with a glass, and then keep sipping all day long.

Move all you can

Having been put on bed rest the last few weeks of my pregnancy, I learned that a lack of movement can increase the chances of constipation and bloating. If you are not on restriction from your doctor, try to at least go on a walk every day to keep your body moving and help promote your bowel function.

Ask about stool softeners

Stool softeners or suppositories may be safe for you to use during pregnancy, but please talk to your doctor first to make sure. If you can use a stool softener, follow the directions carefully and let your doctor know if you don't see improvement in your symptoms.

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Women Who Wait: Getting Pregnant in Your 30's & 40's

Nowadays, many women are waiting until their thirties or even forties to have children. It's been a huge change from a few decades ago, when most women were pregnant, and done having their children before they even turned thirty. Being career driven, waiting for financial stability, finding the perfect partner, or just second-guessing the thought of starting a family, are just a few reasons women are delaying the idea of having children.
 

Many wonder if it's a good thing, or a bad thing, and have juggled the pro's and con's of waiting or not waiting. The aspect of "trying" after multiple unsuccessful attempts, is also a denominator that hopeful mothers in their thirties and forties have to deal with. This can be a physically and emotionally draining experience, and regrets of waiting may come into mind. Questions like, "Why did I wait so long?" or "Is there really a perfect time?," or "Was I being too selfish?" are just a few ideas that can flow through a woman's mind.

Well I just wanted to write an article, to help ease these hopeful mothers' minds, and bring some light to what may seem like a hopeless battle. Hope the following words can help.

-Don't worry about the past, or the future, for that matter. "Woulda, coulda, and shoulda," need to be completely wiped out of your vocabulary. What you can control is where you are right now. That's it. And be content with the place you are in your life, no matter where it is. We're not promised tomorrow, but at least we got today.

-Patience is a virtue, and a virtue may someday be a baby. I know they say, it will happen, when it's supposed to happen. But what do you do when you want the "happen" time to be now? What you do is still give it more time, but when you feel you've given it enough time, then give it hope.

-You shouldn't have to be secretive, or unwilling to share what you're going through. This time can be hard, but you and your partner don't have to go through it alone. Tell your family, your girlfriends, your co-workers, or anyone else you feel will be there to not judge you, but just support you. The more positive energy you surround yourself with, the better.

-And enjoy yourself. This is an exciting time, not a daunting one. You've been responsible enough by this point, to know that you deserve this. So don't stress about it, and have fun doing it.

Hopefully these ideas will help make the baby-making process an easier one. Stay positive, and one day that stick will give you a positive reading as well.

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Ways of Getting Rid of a Diaper Rash

Follow These Tips to Get Rid of That Bad Diaper Rash

Most babies in todays world will have at least one bad diaper rash sometime in their life. Some babies get diaper rashes regardless of how many times you have changed them or how clean they are. There is babies that are just really sensitive to the point where, even certain diapers will make them break out with a rash. My baby girl was extremely sensitive when she was around 6 months old to about 1 1/2 years old. No matter how many times I washed her or even let her butt air dry the rash still appeared. When a baby gets a diaper rash just imagine how uncomfortable they must feel. Being a mother it made me feel so bad for her, knowing that none of the products I have tried worked on her. I think the look and pain of the diaper rash bothered me more than it bothered her.

I started trying out all different products on her to see what products worked the best. I was mixing everything I can possibly imagine that I knew that would be safe to place on a child's butt. Sometimes as a parent we just have to keep finding and experimenting new ideas until we find the right ones. While doing this I came to the conclusion that I have really discovered some really great remedies to treat a child's diaper rash. Here are those awesome tip:

1. Baby powder mixed with a little bit of shortening- Grab a bowl mix these two items together until you have a nice thick consistency of a paste like texture. Place this on your baby's butt make sure you have enough on the rash. It's always better to have more on then less when it comes to something like this then place the diaper on. When it's time for the next diaper change wipe the child's butt very gently with a soft rag place some powder on their butt and another diaper on. This will help, especially when your child butt is very red and raw looking.

2. Destine mixed with Vaseline and powder- Wash your baby's butt pat dry and sprinkle on some powder. Try not to sprinkle on too much just a light coating. Then take your destine and apply that on top of the powder. Now place the Vaseline on top of those two. This is a wonderful combo your precious little baby will feel so much better with this medicine on. When you just use the destine by itself sometimes it's just not enough to be able to clear the rash up.

3. If your baby has a very bad diaper rash please don't use any type of baby wipes, even if they say for sensitive babies. Use a soft wash rag with warm water instead. Then place some cornstarch into the diaper place on child. You may also use flour. Take some flour place it into a frying pan make sure you have enough for a few applications. Then let it get browned a little on low heat. Cool it down until it's on the cool side place this on the diaper rash. The diaper rash will clear up very nicely no harm to the child at all with these methods.

4. Maalox mixed with powder and destine- Grab a bowl mix these three items together to form a paste like texture. Then apply to the diaper rash. When you go to change the diaper the next time, the rash should look a hundred times better almost gone.

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Unassisted Childbirth Dispelling Myths About Freebirth

People mistakenly believe many things about freebirth. Some of the myths are understandable, and some are completely ridiculous. Freebirth is also called purebirth and unassisted birth. It usually occurs at home but shouldn't be confused with midwife-attended homebirth, which is what is usually meant by the term 'homebirth.' Many people don't understand the amount of preparation that goes into planning a freebirth, nor do people seem to realize that planning an unassisted birth doesn't mean you can't decide to go to the hospital at some point. Put aside what you think you know about freebirth for just a moment, and let me fill you in on the facts.

Freebirthers birth completely alone without including friends, family, partners, or other children. Only the mother is present. An unassisted birth is one that occurs without the presence of a medical professional, such as a doctor or midwife. Most unassisted births do include persons other than the mother, such as close friends, other family members, or their husbands. An unassisted birth that occurs when the mother is completely alone is a solo or autonomous birth.

Freebirthers never receive any medical intervention whatsoever; they do not seek medical attention at all. Most unassisted birthers prepare themselves to handle any and all situations that could arise and to recognize emergencies that would require professional treatment. Most will go to the emergency room or at the very least call a midwife if necessary. We simply chose to include professionals only when truly necessary. An unassisted birth where the mother refuses to see a professional or interfere for any reason whatsoever is called a Zion birth.

Freebirthers fear, hate, or have no respect for medical professionals. We have the utmost respect for people who provide care to those in need. We just don't believe in asking for their help unless it's really needed. We want as natural an experience as possible, but we do also want to be safe. We feel that the high rate of intervention in the hospital is unsafe for the average patient. Because of the risks, we want to avoid unnecessary intervention.

Only low-risk patients chose freebirth or can have a safe freebirth. While most unassisted birthers are low-risk, there are many with medium or high risk who chose freebirth and have a very positive outcome.

Freebirthers don't receive prenatal care. We're all different. Some see an ob/gyn or midwife, and some do their own prenatal care. Some have an ultrasound or other testing, and some decline. Some follow the recommended check-up schedule, and some only have one or two checkups per trimester. Others will just take good care of themselves physically, nutritionally, etc. while paying close attention to how they are feeling in order to detect any problems.

Freebirthers care more about the birth experience than their child's safety. We actually see unassisted birth as the healthiest and safest choice, as we can avoid unnecessary and dangerous intervention from medical professionals by birthing this way. We feel natural birth is far more safe than an interventionist one.

Freebirth is a fad, phenomenon, trend, act of rebellion, political statement... It has actually been practiced for centuries, since the age of man began. Midwives and doctors didn't always exist. In many cultures women birth alone or assisted only by family, friends, even young girls just entering puberty or their younger children. Freebirth has been around in America for quite a while as well; it's just gaining in popularity as more people turn away from interventionist hospital births. Moreover, it's getting more publicity now, as more and more people have the courage to speak up about it.

The reason freebirthers chose this path is ___. Freebirthers all believe ___. There are a wide variety of reasons for which people chose to birth unassisted. Most of us have multiple reasons. We may share some reasons in common with others, but every freebirther has her own reasons for her choice. Likewise, we all have our own beliefs about birth.

Freebirthers don't have access to medical interventions such as C-section, drugs, pitocin, or forceps. For one, these things aren't necessary in most births and can be dangerous. Moreover, items such as forceps can be ordered online but are rarely needed. While some freebirthers do live quite far away from the hospital, most live close enough that they can simply call an ambulance if necessary and arrive quite in time for treatment to be successful. Choosing to birth unassisted doesn't mean you can't or won't go to the hospital if you need to or that you can't have intervention if you want or need it. (A hospital with an excellent birthing center is less than ten minutes drive from my home, and I could easily get in the car and go there if I wanted an epidural!)

Both doctors and midwives consider freebirth unsafe. Few doctors are friendly to unassisted birth or homebirth in general, but some are. The majority of midwives are opposed to the practice as well, but there are many who are friendly to it. As time goes by, more professionals are opening their minds to this new practice. What one must keep in mind, though, is that doctors stand to lose money and clients when people turn to homebirth and freebirth. If those practices became the norm, obstetricians would lose most of their income and clients and maybe need to find a new job. Then again, obstetricians don't only exist to assist in birth; they also provide birth control, treat STDs, and help with overall fertility health. Most of their business is from pregnant women, though. While not generally motivated by money it is true that if a person freebirthers rather than paying for a midwife-attended homebirth, midwives lose money and clients. If that became the norm then midwives could go out of business.

Studies have shown that freebirth is dangerous. There is little data available on unassisted birth. One data collection did demonstrate a high neonatal mortality rate of 19. However, this was a Zion birthing community, and the information was collected over two decades ago. Other, more recent sets of data from unassisted birthers--not Zion birthers--suggests that freebirth is quite safe. One set of data about 201 unassisted births has a 0% mortality rate for mother and child; the mothers were of various ages, delivered at various times, were of varying risks, had different approaches to prenatal care, and were carrying babies of many sizes. Another set about 295 births had a neonatal mortality rate of 10 to 1000. One of those 3 deaths occurred because of uterine rupture associated with vaginal birth after C-section,a factor that makes a woman medium to high risk. Therefore, that data suggests a rate of 6.77 per 1000 for a woman with no previous C-sections--about the same number as the national average. There is no guarantee any of those infants would have lived had they been born in a hospital environment because of the circumstances. No controlled studies have actually been done, for who would fund them? (In the freebirth community I participate most, there have been over 40 births and no deaths since November 2006.) A large-scale study of much more than two or three hundred births would provide clearer information about the safety of freebirth.

Children injured in freebirth may be able to sue the mother some day, just like the mother can sue a hospital, doctor, or midwife who causes injury. This is not currently true, and if it ever did become true, it would only be for those children injured by the actions of their mothers. This would mean that the court would have to determine what caused the injury and if the injury would definitely have been prevented by physician-attended hospital birth. Children can't currently sue their parents over parenting decisions that cause harm, such as circumcising or vaccinating them, so it's doubtful they'll ever be able to sue them for freebirthing. The fact that the child would have to prove it was a planned unassisted birth, not an accidental one that was not the parents' fault, makes this even more true.

Freebirthers don't want the best for their children. Oh, please, we love our children just as much as any other parents and want what is best for them. We simply feel that freebirth is a safer, more beneficial option than hospital birth in most situations.

Freebirth is reckless, irresponsible, and dangerous. Most unassisted birthers do immense research to prepare themselves to handle whatever may come up and to know when to go to the hospital. They have to be more educated and more responsible than those who chose hospital birth, because the birth is in their hands--not someone else's. They often take infant CPR and resuscitation classes, rent an oxygen tank, and have various tools available in case needed during the birth. They don't just practice breathing and learn about common interventions; they learn how to midwife themselves in a sense. Unplanned freebirths are very dangerous, because the mother usually has not educated herself as to how to birth without assistance or handle emergencies. Unplanned freebirths happen when the mother is unprepared, and they end badly more often than planned freebirths--but not all the time.

Freebirth is outdated and just as dangerous today as it was centuries ago. Many deaths that occurred back then were due to ignorance. Things are very different now. We know how to detect and treat many more problems. We have better sanitation and hygiene practices. Risk of infection, disease, and illness are low. Our homes are clean. We know to wash our hands. We are capable of recognizing and handling emergencies. People are more educated today than ever. People are less likely to be overworked and malnourished, because we understand nutrition and aren't as poor. The average American woman has a very low risk of her pregnancy ending in sorrow, and its not just due to technology available in hospitals. Birth overall is much safer today, as is life.

Freebirthers are not irresponsible or stupid. They have done a lot of research to educate themselves and are taking full responsibility for their choices. They care as much about their children's safety as any other parent does; they just have a different view on what is the most safe birth choice and environment. Freebirthers aren't trying to impress, shock, or make a statement; they are just doing what they feel is best for their family. Everyone's reasons for choosing this path are different, but they all have one thing in common: the desire for a natural, safe birth for their child.

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Pregnancy Skin Care: Preventing Stretch Marks

Can I Avoid Stretch Marks During Pregnancy?

What are stretch marks?

Stretch marks, the venous skin marks most dreaded during pregnancy, target the skin on your pregnant belly, hips, thighs, arms, and breasts. Stretch marks are caused by collagen that is torn when skin is stretched during pregnancy.

Stretch marks aren't painful, but they can itch as your skin stretches. The worst thing about stretch marks is worrying about whether or not they will go away.

If stretch marks are not extensive, meaning the stretched skin and torn collagen is not severe; they may fade into your skin after you have the baby. If stretch marks don't fade away there are things you can do to minimize their appearance.

Will I get stretch marks?

Not everyone gets stretch marks, but most women do. The extent and depth of your stretch marks is dependent on a few factors.

Your genetic make-up can be a contributing or mitigating factor in the development of stretch marks. This is a factor over which you have no control. If your mother developed stretch marks, most likely, you will have them too.

If you gain too much weight or gain weight too quickly you are also be more likely to develop stretch marks. Watch your weight gain and listen to your doctor's advice about weight gain. It's easy to take advantage of pregnancy to pack on the pounds. You are eating for two. The problem is that after the pregnancy there is only one of you left to work of the pounds and wear the stretch marks.

How to prevent stretch marks

While some stretch marks may be inevitable, there are some things you can do that may help minimize their appearance. I use the term "may" because for every woman you talk to who was able to treat her skin and avoid excessive stretch marks there is someone who will show you stretch marks that run deep and wide which they proudly carry as battle scars.

In general, the following suggestions should help minimize stretch marks.

I was able to minimize stretch marks by applying a moisturizing skin lotion, which contained vitamin E, to my tummy, thighs, and hips every day. When I felt the itch associated with stretch marks I immediately reached for the lotion. While I used extra moisturizing skin lotion with vitamin E, some women swear by coco butter skin formulas.

Gently massaging the skin while applying moisturizer is also believed to help reduce the appearance of stretch marks.

Your skin will also be more elastic, more prone to stretch without tearing, if you keep yourself well hydrated. Your skin is your body's largest organ. It requires plenty of fluid to keep it healthy and supple.

How to treat stretch marks after pregnancy

You may do everything you can to prevent stretch marks and still end up with them following your pregnancy.

The good news is that as you concentrate on your baby, worries about stretch marks and other scars of pregnancy fade further from your mind.

When you find time for yourself, you may find that the stretch marks have faded. Most stretch marks will not fade completely away, but your skin color will lighten up and the stretch marks will become less noticeable within months. Give yourself a good 12 months before you begin to lament that stretch marks have scarred you for life.

Immediately after child birth, begin applying lotion again. I went back to vitamin E and was well pleased with the results. There are now products designed specifically to help reduce the signs of skin scarring and stretch marks. Use this type of skin cream right after pregnancy to begin fading stretch marks. (Consult with your physician before using any topical or oral medication or treatment if you are breastfeeding.)

As your body begins to retake its pre-pregnancy shape, continue to drink water to maintain your skin's elasticity. Working out will also help strengthen and tighten muscles to tone skin and shed extra pounds.

What to do for severe stretch marks

Some women, through no fault of their own, develop a map of stretch marks that no moisturizing skin cream will alleviate nor any fading cream erase. If stretch marks are so severe that they cause a problem with self esteem you may need to consult a doctor.

A dermatologist may be able to recommend a stronger fading cream, but some women consider a tummy tuck the best cure for stretch marks and a sagging tummy.

The important thing to remember is that almost all mothers have experienced stretch marks and the fear that they will never go away. You are in the company of millions of mothers who understand what you are going through.

Choose the solution with which you are most comfortable and which makes the most sense for you and your family. If you are going to have more children, you may as well wait a while for that tummy tuck!

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First Person Tips for a Smoother C-Section Recovery

The first week of c-section recovery can be brutal and filled with questions. Here are some first person tips based on my experience, after having two c-sections, just 11 months apart.

Tip #1

Get On Your Feet ASAP

It is a good idea when you first have your c-section to get up and start moving around as soon as you can. With my first c-section, I was walking around the hospital at 7 AM the morning after. With my second c-section, the nurse did not allow me to walk around until well after noon the next day, and I believe this played a big part in the second c section recovery being more difficult in the long run. According to The American Pregnancy Association taking gentle strolls around the hospital will help speed up recovery.

Tip #2

Ask for Staples Instead of Dissolvable Stitches

Although they sound scary, I actually found that the c-section recovery went much smoother with staples than with dissolvable stitches. I went back to my doctors office just 48 hours after my surgery, and he pulled them out. It was painless, and that was that. The incision was completely healed a month later.

For me, recovering from a c-section with dissolvable stitches was miserable. First you have to wait 1-2 weeks for the butterfly bandages to fall off, and believe me, they can itch like crazy. Then you have to wait for the stitches to dissolve completely, which can take up to 3 months according to the National Health Service. What I ended up with a month after my second c-section was an incision that would have been completely healed, had it not been for the irritating stitches that were still imbedded in my skin.

Tip #3

If You do Get Dissolvable Stitches:

Don't be alarmed if you notice a strings that look like fishing line sticking out of the incision. This happened to me with my second c-section. It can be very uncomfortable when these partially dissolved stitches rub on your clothing, but pulling on hem is a bad idea (and very painful). Instead, carefully clip off the strings with a pair of small sterile scissors or fingernail clippers.

Tip #4

Get a Boppy Pillow

A Boppy pillow can be a real lifesaver during c-section recovery. A lot of times, especially in the first week, it can be difficult to find a comfortable position to feed baby. This can be especially true if you are breastfeeding.Boppy pillows are the perfect shape for getting in a relaxed and comfortable position and keeping pressure off of the incision during feeding times.

Tip #5

Exercise to Regain Strength as Soon as You Can

Just because the incision is healed doesn't mean your c-section recovery is complete. When you give birth by c-section, your stomach muscles are separated in the center and spread to the sides so that the there will be enough room to pull out baby. As you can imagine, this can be pretty hard on your stomach muscles, and some people may be left with a permanent gap and/or stomach muscles that are weak and stretched out. The sooner you can get to work on tightening those weakened stomach muscles, the better your chances are of getting things back to normal. Eight weeks was long enough wait for me to start exercising, but it is best to check with your doctor first to make sure that you are ready.

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Unassisted Childbirth: What If Something Goes Wrong?

How to Recognize True Emergencies & Handle Complication

This is the number one question people ask about unassisted birth. Even those who are planning one worry about this. The truth is that 90% of labors will be complication-free. For every 1,000 live births, only 6.50 infants will die in the first year of life. This includes SIDS, accidents, adverse reactions to vaccines, preemies, etc. The chances of your infant dying are very low. The stillbirth rate in the US is 1 in 115 births, a little less than 1%. The main causes are infection, defects, retarded growth, gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, maternal drug use, postdate pregnancy, physical trauma, placental abruption, radiation poisoning, Rh disease, and umbilical cord accidents. Few deaths occur due to problems during labor & delivery.

Many people assume that if a woman's baby dies during an unassisted birth, it is her fault for not having had a doctor on hand. This is completely untrue. Most infants that die at home would have died in the hospital anyway. The vast majority of stillbirths occur in utero before labor begins. Many are related to problems that can't be treated, only managed--or that can't be managed at all. Even prenatal care will not save an infant from dying in utero. A doctor is likely to recommend preterm birth if an infant's life seems to be in danger during the pregnancy, which is usually equally dangerous for the infant.

There are times when probably arise during labor that can threaten the life of the child. Some of these can be handled at home, and some will need hospital treatment. Mothers learn to recognize these conditions, handle them, and know when to go to the hospital. These labor complications are just as likely to cause death in a hospital as they are in the home, so long as the mother has done her research. Most problems can be handled by a mother simply following her instincts. Rarely does a death occur because of the mother's actions, but because of things that are out of her (or anyone else's) control.

In the hospital, the only sign that a fetus is in danger is discolored amniotic fluid or decelerations in the fetal heart rate. These signs can be recognized at home, too. A mother is perfectly capable of telling if her amniotic fluid is green. She can listen with a Doppler or fetoscope, and if something seems wrong, she can go to the hospital--calling ahead to warn them. It usually takes 15 minutes to prepare for a C-section in the hospital. If they are preparing while the mother is on her way, they can C-section her as soon just moments after her arrival. Sometimes, it will be too late--but this could happen even if she were in the hospital. Some mothers will not attempt an unassisted birth if the hospital is too far away for this reason.

One sign that something is wrong is excess bleeding during or after labor. This could mean problems with the placenta, such as placenta accreta or placental abruption, which puts the child in danger of oxygen deprivation and the mother in danger of hemorrhage. It could also mean that the mother is already hemorrhaging and could bleed to death. If it occurs during labor, a mother should go to the hospital. She should not take any blood thinning medication for pain. There are herbs that can be used to help manage the bleeding. If it occurs after birth, the mother may be hemorrhaging. Many cases can be handled, again, with herbs and maternal rest. If the bleeding is severe or continues, if the mother begins to seizure or feel faint, she should be taken to the emergency room immediately.

Placenta previa is a condition in which the placenta covers the cervix, blocking the baby's exit. The mother can usually feel during labor that the baby is not coming out. She can often feel the placenta during a vaginal check. Spotting during pregnancy can be a sign that the placenta is covering the cervix. This can also be spotted by listening with a Doppler or fetoscope. A mother can learn to differentiate between heartbeat, cord sounds, and placental sounds. She can also palpitate her stomach to feel the location of the placenta. Most of the time the mother will be aware of this condition before labor begins. This is a condition that will require a C-section. It affects about 0.5% of all labors and is not an emergency. Mothers are more likely to hemorrhage with this condition, but usually the baby is delivered fine by C-section.

Another labor emergency is cord prolapse, when the cord is presenting before the infant. If the mother can feel the cord at her cervix, or if it drops into the birth canal before the baby, she is going to need a C-section. The cord can become compressed, cutting off the oxygen supply to the infant. She should try to push the umbilical cord back inside her. An ambulance should be called. She should lay back on her elbows, with her legs and backside elevated as far as possible. This position will utilize gravity to keep the baby from pressing down on the cord. If birth is imminent, and the baby is coming out, she should continue delivering. Otherwise, she needs to wait for the ambulance and go to the hospital for a C-section.

Shoulder dystocia occurs when the baby becomes stuck in the birth canal, his shoulders refusing to come past the pelvis. The baby is at risk of fetal distress, because the cord may become compressed and deprive the child of oxygen. This should be handled as quickly as possible but is no reason to panic. Many times the baby can be dislodged if the mother changes position: squats, rolls around a little, stands up, gets on her hands and knees, or just moves her body sharply. She can lay on her back and flex her legs to her shoulders, which widens the pelvis. If this does not work, someone can attempt to gently dislodge the baby. Hands should be placed on the shoulders, and the baby should be turned gently--sort of corkscrewed out. Another method is to try to dislodge one shoulder, then the next. The attendant can also squeeze the shoulders trying to make them a little smaller. If this fails, someone should call 911 while the mother continues trying to deliver. This is usually resolved without need of a C-section, but it can become an emergency--even in the hospital.

Another common question asked is: What if the baby isn't breathing? If the baby is purple, red, or pink, or pale, keep the child warm. Hold him skin to skin. Talk to her. Rub his back to stimulate him. Lay her face down over her thigh with her bum higher than her head to facilitate mucous drainage. Give her a moment. If she doesn't perk up, begin administering CPR if she does not start breathing. Flicking the feet, applying a cayenne tincture on the lips, or even giving the baby a good hard slap can help her breath. If the baby is pale blue, white, limp, or seems almost dead, suction the nose, start CPR, and call 911. Many mothers rent an oxygen tank so they can give the child oxygen if necessary.

An inverted uterus is rare. It occurs when the uterus inverts and comes down the birth canal after the baby. This can be solved by balling your hand up into a fish, gently sticking it into the vagina, and pushing the uterus back up past the cervix. This is very painful. Inverted uterus increases the mother's risk of hemorrhage. Mothers suffering this complication should go to the hospital.

If there is meconium in the water or if the water is discolored, your baby is at an increased risk of infection. However, this is not a guarantee that anything is wrong. The baby should be born and washed up. If he seems to need medical attention, take him to a clinic right away. This is not a complication or emergency. With treatment after birth, the baby should be fine even if he did inhale a little meconium.

Most people are afraid that the cord will be around the baby's neck. This is not an emergency, and it's not uncommon! The cord is around the neck about 30% of the time. Usually it causes no damage and is loose enough that the mother can simply unwind it, or somersault the baby out of the cord as he emerges. If it is tight enough, it may be cutting off the baby's oxygen supply. In this situation the parents would cut the cord and then push the baby out as quickly as possible. Many unassisted birth stories include the mother mentioning that she had to unwind the cord from around the child's neck. My own son was born with his cord loosely around his neck. The doctor simply cut it, and that was it! The cord shouldn't be cut unless necessary though, as it keeps providing oxygen to the infant.

Tearing is less common at home in the hospital but can occur anyway. Most tearing is mild and will heal on its own. Many mothers handle severe tearing by holding the skin together and applying superglue. However, some mothers do have severe tearing that heals all on its own. The mother can go to the hospital for stitches if she likes, but this is no reason to panic.

Many things we perceive as complications are just normal events that aren't extremely common. Many events during the labor can be handled by a mother on her own, and she can even learn to evaluate her risks of complications. Most mothers will solve these problems using what they've learned by researching and by relying on their instincts. Many times, if a mother's actions cannot save the child's life, neither would the doctors except in rare situations (birth defects, premature birth, etc). There are true emergencies that do require hospital and even C-section delivery. Mothers planning an unassisted birth learn to recognize these emergencies and know how to handle them. They also know when they should and should not attempt to deliver their baby at home. The simple answer to the question "What if something goes wrong?" is "The birthing couple will be prepared to handle it."

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Unassisted Pregnancy: Naturally Managing Complications Natural Alternatives to Medications and Procedures

This goes along with the question of "What if something goes wrong?" As I've already said in other articles, the simple answer is that the mother will handle it. Many freebirthers prefer to think of complications as 'variations of normal' that happen during pregnancy, labor, and birth. While the majority of pregnancies are low-risk and very safe, not all are completely uneventful. If they become too severe, the mother should of course see a doctor or midwife. However, many of these issues can be managed at home by a well-informed mother. There is no reason to panic!

Preeclampsia is pregnancy-induced hypertension or, in other words, high blood pressure. It is also called toxemia. It is common in first time mothers, teenage or multiple pregnancies, and women over 40. Smoking, drinking, and other unhealthy lifestyle practices can increase the risk of preeclampsia. There may also be a genetic factor. It occurs once the pregnancy has reached 20 week gestation. It happens in only 5-8% of pregnancies, and those with healthy lifestyles are very unlikely to be affected by it. Preeclampsia can cause low birth weight babies by depriving the placenta of blood. It can develop into eclampsia, which will cause seizures, but this is very rare--especially for those who recognize the condition and treat it.

Mild preeclampsia will cause high blood pressure, water retention, and protein in the urine; you may swell more than usual and notice your pee is cloudy. Severe preeclampsia causes headaches, blurred vision, light sensitivity, fatigue, nausea and vomiting, abdominal pain, and shortness of brush. When a mother suspects preeclampsia, she should take it easy and get lots of rest. There are many things she can do to help lower her blood pressure. These include limiting salt intake, drinking more water, and avoiding unhealthy foods and substances like fried foods, alcohol, and caffeine. Exercising 30 minutes a day will also help. Preeclampsia is rare in those who do this regularly, so these methods are great for both prevention and treatment of this complication.

Bleeding is common during pregnancy, especially in the first trimester. As many as 20-30% of women bleed early on, and only half of them have miscarriages. Bright red bleeding or gushes of blood are signs of trouble. Do not wear a tampon if you are bleeding, and stop douching and having sex. Bleeding can be caused by miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, molar pregnancy, or placental problems such as previa or abruption. Miscarriage is the most common, occurring 15% of the time. Ectopic pregnancies happen in about 1 in 60 conceptions. Molar pregnancies are extremely rare and end in miscarriage. Treatment should include lots of rest, as well as palpitating the stomach for placental location. In this situation it would be very wise for a woman to see a doctor or midwife in hopes of diagnosing the problem and treating it. In many cases, miscarriage cannot be prevented, but in late pregnancy, a C-section could save the baby's life. Bleeding should be taken seriously.

Gestational diabetes is temporary and is cured by delivery of the baby. For some reason, during pregnancy, the body may stop producing enough insulin. Other names for it include glucose intolerance and carbohydrate intolerance. It occurs most often in older or overweight women, and there may be a genetic factor. Only 2-5% of all pregnancies are affected by gestational diabetes. It can cause macrosomia (or large birth weight). This increases risk of labor complications, like shoulder dystocia. The newborn may have hypoglycemia, low blood sugar, which usually clears itself up in a few days after a few breastfeeding sessions. The baby may be hungry, shaky, sweaty, dizzy, tired, weak, or more prone to crying, but he should recover quite quickly without any serious side effects. It could also cause jaundice, which also clears up on its own.

If a mother feels very thirsty, is peeing more often, is tired or nauseated, develops many infections, or experiences blurred version, she may have gestational diabetes. She can confirm it with a simple blood test, done at home if she likes. If gestational diabetes is suspected, it is best to err on the side of caution and begin treatment. A healthy diet is the best treatment. The mother should limit her intake of simple sugars and carbohydrates, get lots of rest, and exercise. Natural sugars, such as those found in fruits, are much safer. Snacking on healthier foods will make a big difference. Like preeclampsia, a healthy lifestyle is both good prevention and good treatment.

Severe nausea and vomiting can be a sign of gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, and multiple pregnancy. However, it does not always mean something is wrong. Some women just have very bad morning sickness that lasts throughout the pregnancy. A mother suffering from this should keep her eyes open for signs of a complication without worrying herself too much. Eating more, sticking to foods she can keep down, and ingesting lots of ginger can help her deal with it. Sleep-deprivation can be linked to these symptoms, so mothers should get lots of rest. Drinking lots of water will prevent dehydration and may help with the nausea.

Carrying multiples isn't really a complication, but a variation of normal. It can make for a more difficult pregnancy and increase risk of certain afflictions. The average woman has a chance of only 3% of naturally conceiving twins. Fraternal twins are more common, and triplets occur in only 1 in 8,000 births. Twins are more likely to occur in women who are taking fertility medications, eat lots of conventional foods with additives, have had 4+ pregnancies or already delivered twins, or are overweight. A family history of twins increases that chance, as does cultural background, for African Americans are more likely to conceive multiples. The percentage increases every few years for women over the age of 30. Yams and high dairy diets can make twins more likely, too. The risks of preterm labor, gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, and severe nausea and vomiting, and breech birth are increased.

Mothers may be carrying twins if they feel unusually tired, hungry, or nauseated, have very early symptoms, or feel lots of movement very early on. Mothers of multiples often begin to show sooner, and their uterus will measure large for how far along they are. She can diagnose herself by listening with Doppler or fetoscope after 20 weeks or palpitating her stomach for fetal position in the late third trimester. Many mothers planning an unassisted birth have surprise twins! She can handle all of these symptoms by drinking lots of water, eating her fill, and getting plenty of rest. She should be prepared for labor by 36 weeks, as few twin pregnancies last longer than that. In the later weeks, she may detect that one infant is "malpositioned." In that case, she can attempt ECV or external cephalic version--a maneuver in which the baby is turned in the uterus from the outside.

Pregnancies are considered term at 37 weeks, 36 weeks for multiples. Preterm labor is especially dangerous before 34 weeks, as babies don't develop the breathing & sucking refluxes necessary for survival until then. Preterm labor won't complicate the delivery, but it can cause severe problems for the child. Premature birth is in and of itself a whole article; the obstacles that these babies have to overcome are too many to name here. About 6% of babies in the United States are born prematurely due to spontaneous labor. Mothers who have had variations of normal during their pregnancies are at a greater risk of preterm labor, as are mothers who had pre-existing conditions. These other factors increase the risk: having had a previous premature delivery, being African American, drug use during pregnancy, being a teenager or over the age of 35, being short, having experienced bleeding, and having given birth in the past 18 months. High levels of stress will also raise your chances of preterm labor.

A mother can tell she may go into labor premature if her cervix is softening and opening, if she is experiencing more Braxton-Hicks, if her bag of waters breaks or leaks, or if she loses her mucous plug. None of these guarantee preterm labor. A broken bag of waters can repair itself, and the placenta keeps making amniotic fluid until the baby is born. Don't panic if it happens. Strong contractions that increase in frequency and occur in a pattern, especially when accompanied by back pain, indicate labor. Labor can be slowed with plenty of rest and by remaining well-nourished and hydrated. Drinking alcohol will slow the labor and is unlikely to harm the fetus, especially considering fetal alcohol syndrome occurs after binge drinking in the early months. Many doctors and midwives recommend a glass or two of red wine. There are many herbal remedies that a mother can use to help slow and prevent premature labor.

A baby in the breech or transverse position isn't a complication, just a variation of normal. Mothers can tell if this is occurring by feeling their stomach for fetal position. She can attempt ECV, external cephalic version, to turn the baby manually. There are numerous maneuvers to help coax the baby into a head-down position. On an empty stomach, the mother should lie on her back with her hips high in the air a few times a day for 15-20 minutes. Getting on all fours and slowly lowering her chest to the floor, so her hips are higher than her head, may also work. Some suggest playing classical music near the pelvic bone, or visualizing the infant turning. Many infants will turn by the time labor begins on their own.

Postdate or overdue pregnancy occurs when a woman has reached her due date and gone to 42 weeks of pregnancy without delivering. There is an increased risk of stillbirth and the baby passing meconium while in the womb, leading to infection. Very rarely does pregnancy last past 44-45 weeks. A mother should keep an eye on her pregnancy, monitoring fetal movement and heart tones closely. She can try to induce labor by eating spicy foods and pineapple, staying active, having sex, and stimulating her nipples. Going for a bumpy ride can help the baby's head engage into the pelvis. If she feels it's necessary, she can attempt inducing by drinking castor oil mixed in orange juice or by swallowing some herbal tinctures. There are many safe, natural ways of inducing labor, though it is rarely necessary. A mother who is overdue needs more rest and must continue to keep herself well-nourished and hydrated. Her best bet is just to wait it out; her baby will appear in its own time!

Mothers who chose unassisted pregnancy and childbirth are more likely to be living a healthy, natural lifestyle, which puts them at far less risk for these problems than other women. Exercising and eating right prior to becoming pregnant can help prevent many of these conditions. None of these conditions are catastrophic, despite how alarmed doctors seem to be by them. If the complication becomes too severe for a mother to manage, she should see a doctor or midwife. However, these natural methods of managing complications are just as effective and much safer than medication and other alternatives. Following a healthy diet, exercising, drinking lots of water, and getting plenty of rest are the best things a mother can do to care for herself during pregnancy. This is especially true of pregnancies during which variations of normal occur.

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Take Your Time After Your C-Section

C-Section Recovery

I can give my best advice in one second! I don't even have to ponder or consider it. "Don't get in a hurry and enjoy your baby!" I've had four c-sections. Since having the first in 1966, I've observed more and more babies being delivered by c-section. I had never even heard of one before I was told I was having one. My information isn't a bunch of researched, generalized, or fictionalized information. In other words, I've recovered from four C-Sections.

LOGIC

By way of introduction, my beliefs are as follows. Giving life to another human being through becoming the person who gives over the rights to their body, and one does just that, to the care, creation, and formation of a new life is the highest calling on earth for a woman.

That belief is my Christian belief.

I believe God chose a young woman named Mary to birth his own son and therefore elevated the status of womanhood forever. Therefore, for a woman to chose to give the gift of life is the greatest gift she can give herself, the baby's Father, the baby, and the family. I believe this fact should inform any female considering a possible venture into Motherhood.

In giving this gift, the woman, knowingly or unknowingly, chooses to lay down her very life for the life of the child. For even in today's modern world of miracle science, a woman cannot know really know what lies before her in such a journey. And, yes, sometimes, childbirth still can take the life of the Mother. And such costs should always be counted before planning a life journey.

THE JOURNEY

My journey began in 1966 due to carrying a breach baby. That's when the baby's head is upward toward the heart of the Mother rather than pointing downward into the birth canal. The doctor gave me exercises to encourage the baby to turn. And, when the baby didn't turn, a section was scheduled. Now, it's really nice to be able to schedule when a baby will arrive! I liked that part. I wasn't at all prepared for much beyond and fortunately, as a first time Mom, the doctor knew that and gave me roommate Mommie who was having her 6th or so. I was so grateful and ask her lots of questions. Did I mention, I was 19 years old with only 1 year of college behind me. A good doctor can go a long way in helping all to go well. Listen to those you trust and choose yours wisely!

MY ADVICE: Enjoy your baby! If this isn't happening, it is a sign that there is a big need for help. Get what help you need. Don't put it off thinking tomorrow it'll be better. My opinion and experience showed me proper diet, exercise, and rest are the fundamentals of a healthy and quick recovery. If you observe all these, your recovery will go well, your baby will get the care and attention it needs and deserves, and most likely so will everyone else.

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Vitamin D Might Lower Your Risk for Uterine Fibroids

Vitamin D has been shown to be beneficial for many health conditions. A new study released in 2013 revealed yet another benefit: women with adequate vitamin D levels had lower rates of uterine fibroids.

Uterine fibroids are non-cancerous growths of the muscle in the uterus. They may often lead to abnormally high bleeding during or between menses, difficulty with pregnancy, as well as pain with pressure, particularly pain during intercourse. Treatment for fibroids may require a surgical procedure, and is the leading cause of hysterectomy ( removal of the uterus ) for women in the United States.

Results showed that women obtaining the recommended amount of vitamin D had a 32% lower rate of uterine fibroids. Women who received one-hour exposure to sunlight per day had a 40% lower rate.

All women are at risk for developing fibroids. Their growth is relatively slow, and may take years to develop symptoms. The findings suggest that maintaining adequate vitamin D levels early in life might help prevent the actual development or slow the rate of growth of fibroids.

The skin when exposed to sunlight naturally produces Vitamin D. Concerns for skin cancer have resulted in no official recommendations for sun exposure by the medical community. Mushrooms, fortified milk, eggs and fish are excellent sources of vitamin D. Cheese has relatively low levels of vitamin D as a result of its natural processing. Most yogurts have no vitamin D, unless specifically stated in the label. Dannon and Yoplait are two of the leading brands that fortify their yogurts.

Supplements are an efficient source of vitamin D, but care must be taken to avoid obtaining more than 4,ooo International Units ( IU ) per day as such high levels might be dangerous. General recommendations by the FDA are for women to obtain from 400 to 1,000 IU's per day.

Considering the many health benefits of vitamin D, it should be a part of everyone's diet.

Vitamin D might interfere with many medications, especially those used for blood pressure and heart disease. You must consult with your physician before starting a vitamin D3 supplement regimen.

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Six Early Pregnancy Symptoms I Experienced in my First Week

When I found out I was pregnant, it was the happiest day of my life. Little did I know my body was going to feel like it had been taken over by aliens. These are the symptoms I was experiencing the week I found out I was pregnant.

Early Pregnancy Symptom #1 Needing to use the bathroom all the time

The week I found out I was pregnant I was constantly running to the bathroom. I could not go for more than an hour or two at a time without making a pit stop. I thought that maybe I was getting a urinary tract infection.

Nighttime was the worst. I would just fall asleep and then be woken up with the need to use the bathroom. This would happen several times throughout the night. This was actually one of the reasons I thought I could be pregnant.

To lessen the trips to the bathroom at night I began to limit the amount I would drink in the evenings. This helps some, but the nighttime bathroom trips were still a regular occurrence.

Early Pregnancy Symptom #2 Nausea

One of the pregnancy symptoms I had the week I found out I was pregnant was nausea. From the time I got up in the morning my stomach felt like it was doing flip-flops. The smell of certain foods made me turn green. I never actually threw up in the first few weeks of pregnancy though.

I think I would have felt better had I been able to throw up. I tried eating crackers in the morning before I got out of bed. That did not really help too well. I also tried drinking Ginger ale. It would help for a little while. I ate only bland foods. I tried to avoid being around where food was cooking.

I could not wear any perfume or lotion that was scented. Going to the store was miserable. My stomach just could not take so many different fragrances. I did find that if I sucked on a piece of peppermint candy my stomach would settle for a little bit.

The nausea only got worse as my pregnancy went along. I started vomiting around eight weeks. I would throw up several times a day. I still to this day do not understand why they called it morning sickness.

Early Pregnancy Symptom #3 Tired

The first week I found out I was pregnant I was more tired than usual. I was a night owl. I would stay up until at least one or two watching TV. Suddenly I could not make it past ten o clock. It was all I could do to drag myself out of bed in the morning. I would get up, use the bathroom, and go right to the couch. I spent the first four months of my pregnancy on the couch.

I could fall asleep within minutes. It used to take me hours to unwind and go to sleep. I could be in mid sentence and doze off. It is amazing how much a growing baby can affect your body.

Early Pregnancy Symptom #4 Moody
One of the pregnancy symptoms I had in the first week was moodiness. I would be happy and all of sudden burst out crying. I would get angry for no real reason. My husband was afraid to say anything because he did not know how I would react.

It was similar to the way you would feel right before your period starts. I kind of thought that is what was happening until I got the positive on the pregnancy test.

Early Pregnancy Symptom #5 Sore Breasts

A major symptom of early pregnancy for me was sore breasts. I could not stand anything touching them. My bra about drove me insane. I had a hard time at night because I slept on my stomach. Even the water in the shower caused pain.

I tried to sleep on my side but sure enough, I would wake up on my stomach with my breasts aching. I found a sports bra helped a little at night.

Early Pregnancy Symptom #6 Nasty Taste in my Mouth

Another early pregnancy symptom I had was a nasty taste in my mouth. No matter how many times I brushed my teeth or used mouthwash it would not go away. I always felt like I had bad breath. I found sucking on a piece of peppermint candy would help for a little while.

These are a few of the early symptoms I had the first week I found out I was pregnant. More symptoms appeared each week of the pregnancy. Remember not all women have the same early pregnancy symptoms. Some women have none and have completely healthy babies.

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